It's March 7, 2021.
One year ago today, I was eagerly anticipating my student's participation in the annual Large Group Performance Evaluations in my home state of Georgia. Here are three links to my 8th graders performances and sight singing that week:
I felt the shut down coming.
I wasn't sure when or what day or for how long, but I knew.
I didn't sleep much.
I so desperately wanted for my students to get this experience before the shut down happened.
Performance experiences change everything for kids in middle school.
They had worked so hard.
They sang March 11, 2020.
They came to school March 12, 2020. I moved their seats around in preparation for the final nine weeks.
At 5 PM that day, we learned of the shut down.
We thought it would be until Easter 2020.
I haven't seen my students "live" since March 12, 2020.
On Tuesday, March 9, 2021, I'll get my first students "live". It's optional. I'll be teaching concurrently as so many of you have done since August 2020.
So the live flame in the photo at the top of this post represents the eternal flame of art...of music...of life.
I burned it tonight in the place where I am staying as I prepare to get the vaccine in Alabama, 3 hours from where I live in Georgia, because there is nothing like real fire...you light it....it has a life....and if you don't fuel it anymore, it dies.
I teach in Georgia, but I'm here in Alabama because I can get a vaccine with ease even though I am from out of state, and it's legal and allowed.
...and Georgia is
49th in the number of vaccines administered. My 75 year old neighbor across the street can't get her second shot because things are so poorly handled in my home state.
So, I decided to come to Alabama.
About 10 days after I booked the appointment, our governor announced that teachers were eligible for the vaccine starting, ironically, tomorrow.
So, my private school teacher friends have been texting me..."I'm getting mine Monday, March 8! School is providing!"
...Representing the inequities of the haves and the have nots.
I am a proud public school educator...
...and I'm happy for them.
They've been teaching "live" all year while the private schools have hidden their real covid numbers from the media because when parents pay, their kids go to school...pandemics and all...whether the teachers are at risk or not.
So, I get that.
But, I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say that I am a little frustrated.
I'm frustrated for my public school teaching peers who have been teaching hybrid/live since August or September. I am sorry for the ones who have gotten ill from Covid and have lingering effects. I'm sad for the family members they brought it home to. I'm sad for the ones who've died.
I'm frustrated when Dr. Fauci says that teachers don't really need to get vaccinated to be back in school.
I've taught for 29 years, and as a choir teacher, the students are blowing their germs in my face daily in large groups, and I get at least 2 colds a years...so I know how this goes.
I've thought about inviting him...actually some of his unvaccinated friends (are there any?!) to my classroom. I'd like them to sit and watch as we just figure it out the way we always do.
Tonight, there was symbolism as I prepare to go get vaccinated in the state where I don't live.
Symbolism for us all...the ones who've been teaching live since August...the ones who've had to figure out how to teach music virtually/hybrid and both...the ones whose salaries were cut...the ones who had to leave their children and find child care because their district sent the teachers back, but their children are in a different district...the single Moms...
My Mother was a single Mom who didn't graduate from high school. I know the sacrifices she made for me.
Here is the symbolism in this evening for me as I prepare to get vaccinated in a state where I don't live because my state doesn't have it together...and because I am fortunate enough to have the means to do it...and many are not.
I brought one of those multi-purpose lighters from home that you just click.
I brought a candle here as well. I always light a candle wherever I travel in memory of my Mom.
I brought some of the "easy light" fire logs because I knew there was a fire pit where I was staying.
I used the fire wand to light the candle.
It lit with ease, and the candle that I lit for my Mom was burning.
I threw the fire logs into the fire pit. I clicked the wand to light the two logs. The first log lit with ease. The second log took a few clicks. I finally get a little flame going on it, but I wanted more to make sure the fire was really going to happen.
The fire wand was done.
Much like so many of us...who've taught "live" since August...who've figured out virtual teaching...who've sacrificed and balanced and learned and just done the best we can.
The famous saying is "burned out". It's been used for teachers for years.
I am thankful to get this vaccine tomorrow.
I want, as we all want, to return to normal.
We want to sing "live".
...and we will.
For me, this moment is the beginning of the end of this dark moment.
Hang in there everyone...
Wishing you all the best.
As I've been saying since I started sharing my work...
Take one day at a time. Don't beat yourself up when you make errors.
"Live singing" is coming back.
It's part of the human spirit..and the human spirit always prevails.
This the beginning of the end of the pandemic...and the beginning of the return to normalcy.